Chapter 44 The Legacy No Notary Can Divide
When people speak about an inheritance, most immediately think of a house. Money. Land. Objects passed from one generation to the next. I too worked throughout my life. I founded companies. Developed projects. Built homes I later had to leave. I saw ideas become reality. And I saw other dreams disappear almost as quickly as they were born.
There were years of success. And there were years when I had to begin again from the start. Today, I understand that almost nothing we possess is made to last forever. Buildings change or disappear. Companies are sold, take another name, or cease to exist. Money comes and goes.
Even objects to which we are emotionally attached one day pass into other hands. A notary can determine who receives what.
He can divide a house. A bank account. A collection. But the most important legacy of a human being can never be fully described in any legal document. There is a wealth no notary can divide. The way we lived. The love we gave. The honesty with which we treated others. The courage we passed on to someone. The confidence we awakened in another.
And the hope we left in that person’s heart. When I think about that, I first think of my father. He did not leave me a great fortune. He owned no castles. No stocks. No collection of precious objects. He was a simple miner. On every workday, he descended deep underground to bring up coal. Not because that was his dream. But because he wanted to give his children a better future than the one he had known.
From him, I inherited the conviction that honest work gives a person dignity. That we must not wait for someone else to solve our problems. That after a setback, we must try to rise again. And that a father’s value is determined not by what he gathers for himself, but by what he is willing to carry for his family.
My mother too left me an invaluable legacy. She taught me that love is not expressed through words alone. Love becomes visible in what we do for another person. In all the times we set aside our own comfort. In the care with which we surround someone. In the meal that is ready. In the hand that holds us.
And in the presence that remains even when life becomes difficult. How many times did she think first of her children and only afterward of herself? When I was young, it seemed self-evident to me.
Only much later did I understand how much strength and courage that required. And Marco too left me a legacy. Normally, we think a father leaves something to his son. But a son can also pass something to his father that remains forever. Marco gave me his curiosity. His interest in technology.
His conviction that behind every problem, a solution might still be hidden. Where others said, “It cannot be done,” he would instead begin to wonder why it could not be done. That way of looking kept me young too. Even today, when I discover or try to understand something new, I often think of him.
Then part of his curiosity continues to live within me. I myself thus became proof that the greatest legacy does not always pass from the older to the younger. Sometimes parents receive something from their children.
My beloved wife Dorina, still by my side after all these years.
Sometimes a son forever transforms the way his father looks at the world. When I reflect on what I myself want to leave behind, I therefore do not think first about my material possessions. Of course, throughout my life, I tried to care for my family. I worked. Took risks. Founded companies. I wanted to build security for the people I loved.
But money and possessions were never the true goal. I worked because I wanted to give my family a better future. Just as my father had tried to do before me. If Michael, my grandchildren, and those who come after me think about me one day, I do not hope they will remember mainly how many hours I worked. I hope they will understand why I worked. I hope they will remember that I always began again.
That even after my trust was betrayed, I nevertheless continued believing in people. That I made mistakes, but tried to learn from them. And that despite everything life took from me, I never stopped loving my family. I do not want to be remembered only for my good decisions. My mistakes too are part of my story.
Perhaps those who come after me can even learn more from them than from my successes. My life does not prove that hard work always leads to success. Sometimes we can give everything and still lose. Nor does it prove that trust is never betrayed. That certainly happened.
But I hope my path through life shows that a defeat need not mean the end of a human being. That we can begin again after a fall. That we must not allow bitterness to have the final word.
And that even when we cannot repair everything, we can always choose again how we continue along our road. My children and grandchildren do not have to follow the same path as I did. Quite the opposite. I hope they will find their own way. That they will dare to follow their own dreams.
That they will not live according to other people’s expectations. And that they will feel free to make different choices from mine. A legacy must not become a burden. It must not be a mission to repeat the lives of earlier generations. It should be a compass.
Something that can indicate a direction when the road becomes uncertain, without prescribing the destination someone must choose. Perhaps one of my grandchildren will open this book one day. Perhaps out of curiosity. Perhaps because he or she wants to know who the people visible in old photographs were. But perhaps a page will be read at a moment of doubt.
My brother Mario, who left us far too soon.
At a moment when something has failed. When someone risks losing confidence in themselves. Or when life feels heavier than expected. If somewhere in this book there is one thought that gives someone courage again… one memory that makes it clear no one has to carry everything alone… or one sentence that helps someone not to give up… then this book has achieved its deepest purpose.
To me, that would be the most beautiful legacy of all. Not a monument bearing my name. Not a company expected to last forever. Not a possession proving what I once accomplished. But words that reach a heart at the right moment. Memories that continue connecting a family. Values that take another form in new lives.
And love that continues its journey even when the person who once gave it is no longer here.
Perhaps one of my grandchildren will then feel me very close again for a moment. Not as an entrepreneur. Not as someone who founded companies or developed projects. Not even first as a writer. But simply… as their grandfather. A grandfather who was not perfect. Who dreamed a great deal. Who sometimes fell. But who always tried to rise again.
And who, above all, wanted to pass on to them that they are loved. Truly, I cannot imagine a more beautiful legacy. In the end, we do not continue living through what we accumulated. We continue living through what we passed on.
People to whom I remain grateful
Together with my brothers—a cherished memory that belongs to our family.
Together with my brothers—a bond that has endured through the years.
With Claudio and Peppino Smarelli, childhood friends from De Lindeman.
Together with my brothers at Fabrizio’s wedding celebration in Germany.
My dear friend Umberto, with whom I shared a close friendship for many years.
Germaine, who was like a second mother to us and prayed for Marco every day.
My cousin Orazio—a true family man with a zest for life, who left us far too soon.
With my dearest cousin Massimo, who holds a very special place in my heart.
With my dear cousin Stefano.
With my cousin Vinicio and his family during a warm gathering in Loreto Aprutino.
With Arturo, Giuseppina and their children Luciano and Nicola.
With our hundred-year-old family friend Peppino and his wife—a special encounter filled with warmth and respect.
Peppino Smarelli and my cousin Arturo at De Lindeman in 1968.
With Claudio, Tommaso and my cousin Fernando in Loreto Aprutino.